“A splendid view unfolded before us that is made up of someone’s thorns,
Someone else will surely be comforted by looking at your thorns,
We are each other’s night scenery, each other’s moon”
Mono came into our lives as a friend who refused to leave our side when we swam in our own pool of negativity, who laid a blanket over us when we cried ourselves to sleep, and who turned into our shadow when we walked alone; all the while reminding us that things might not get better right away, but it shall pass.
More often than not, listening to Mono has reminded ARMYs of the extent to which BTS, as a group, has been often dehumanized. Listening to the tracks, at least for the first time, hits us with a realization of the existence of a dark phase in RM’s life. As much as we like to glorify the fact that RM took over the role of a Kpop group leader at a mere age of 16, we often don’t talk about the psychological impacts of a teenager trying to take on the world that has never been easy on this group. RM created Mono in an attempt to show us his true self. For once, he created something for himself and wanted us to be a part of his personal journey.
Image credit: BigHit Entertainment
Mono: A Manifestation of the Dark Self
Mono is entirely the embodiment of RM from 2016 – early 2018 – a phase that has molded him into who he is today. He surrounded himself with monochromatic colors. His studio, his wardrobe, his collections – nothing was spared of this monochrome filter. We also find RM often musing to himself (monologues), albeit unsure when exactly did he pick up this habit.
Image credits: BigHit Entertainment
His life, during this stage, has played along the spectrum of just 3 colors – grey, white and black; perhaps mostly living in the blacks. He sought sanctuary in the night time. He felt that night liberated him, and that feeling gave birth to “Moonchild”; a song that has become the anthem for Mono nation. A song that celebrates people who have found their freedom at night – freedom from their day jobs, society’s scrutiny, or any other possible pain. “Moonchild”feels like the personification of a friend who will tell you: “This is how life will be. That we are destined to be hurt more than it is humanly possible to tolerate, but you’re gonna make it regardless.” And all the while it reminds us of the fact that there are hundreds of Moonchildren out there, who are waiting to be heard, to feel validated, to find a true sense of “freedom”; and so we need to become each other’s savior, each other’s moon.
Mono: A Breakdown of the Tracks
When we talk about the concept of “freedom,” it is rather heartbreaking to realize that RM never really found his own freedom for the longest time. His mention of freedom in both “Moonchild” and “Forever Rain” comes in the sense that there is no freedom until one dies. And we are not dead yet, because every next moment we are ready to put on a greater load and have ourselves chained to yet another thing. Your body becomes so weary that“Forever Rain” is the only true companion you are left with. When RM sings
“Please don’t ask any questions
But do keep pouring forever
I’m not lonely when you’re pouring
Please stay by my side
Wanna live in the ashy world
I know that there’s no forever”
It reeks of the loneliness human beings feel at certain points in their lives. If you have ever experienced losing control over yourself and breaking down in a park full of people, or perhaps amidst a road you’ve been walking on – rain is something you might find yourself praying for. With “Forever Rain,” RM finds himself wondering if he will ever be able to make another song that can touch his heart the same way again.
This desolation and loneliness becomes very apparent when RM whistles in “Tokyo.” The whistle is haunting and echoes back to your own self that is lonely and seeks this desired freedom.
“Uhgood” seems to have been created on a similar note. The pain of not being enough, not meeting up to your own expectations, is not something unknown to us. We often apply such high expectations and terms & conditions on our own selves that failing them hits harder than we prepare ourselves for. We blur our own line between real and ideal. This is more the reason why RM wants us to be each other’s moon and guiding light. We heal faster when we master the ability to feel another’s pain; because isn’t it easier to love others more than it is to love ourselves?
We find some respite and solace in “Everything Goes.” The repetitive intro of the mantra “it shall pass” and “everything goes” is something that RM borrowed from his counselor and passed on to us. He believes that the only way to release psychological pain is to keep saying that everything will pass eventually, and this in turn slowly reduces the pain. It’s a mantra that he keeps repeating to himself, and that’s the reason why the repetition of those words hold so much importance. There aren’t many lyrics in this song, but “Everything Goes” is sometimes what you need to hear, more than “It will be okay.” Why? Because it’s at times absurd to guarantee someone that they will be okay, but you can never go wrong with telling someone that it shall go away. RM believes that sometimes intuitive consolation can be more helpful than logical advice.
Each song in the playlist blends into the other so effortlessly, it successfully creates the effect that RM wanted in his playlist. While talking about Mono, RM delves upon how the cathartic experience of listening to an entire album can sometimes be greater than the cathartic experience of listening to just one song. He wanted to create a playlist that would make people want to listen to all the tracks, till the end. Well, I hope someone can tell him that he has achieved that desired effect and no Mono lover can now listen to one song without listening to all the songs till the end.
Every song in RM’s second playlist Mono is a black-and-white masterpiece that pulls us out of the greys of our lives in myriads of ways.
As someone who hails from a small town and has lived in the same place for over a decade now, the ability to relate to the track “Seoul” comes very naturally. RM's use of the words love and hate as synonyms to the same feeling and emotion is startling and so accurate that it sets the tone of the entire song. Every person, no matter where they belong, shares a love-hate relationship with their home place. At times it starts to suffocate you; you see your friends grow up and grow apart; people come and leave, but the town, the city remains. The bus stands remain. The local stores remain. The taxi driver who gave you a ride 4 years back is probably still there waiting for his next passenger. The food sold by your favorite restaurant hasn’t changed, and one whiff of it throws you right back to where you started. So you stay, you stay because you cannot outgrow your home. So you keep coming back and you keep singing to yourself:
“I am leavin’ you, I am livin’ you”
Mono: An End and A Beginning
Not that RM has ever mentioned it, but the handwriting analysis in Mono’s tracklist is something I would like to talk about. You can see that the tracklist has been written by RM with his non-dominant hand. Many therapists, counselors, or mentors advise their clients to practice writing with their non-dominant hand. While doing so, one connects with their inner child/inner self, and it, in turn, helps them heal from their trauma. It is not a secret to any of us that Mono is a reflection of RM’s journey to healing from his own psychological pain. I believe creating Mono has helped a part of him be liberated from that pain. What makes it an even more of a healing experience for him is his decision to make the songs “Tokyo,” “Badbye,” and “Everything Goes” with his childhood friend Donghyuk and his superheroes – Aeon and Nell, respectively. RM is thankful to Aeon and Nell, who have taught him that sad songs can heal one’s sorrow.
Image credits: BigHit Entertainment
RM started leaning towards more colorful clothes and is no longer attracted to just monochromatic ones. He believes this is a very significant change for him, as a person’s mental state can have a great impact on their daily life choices. RM has also shared that he no longer prefers the night time. And we know it, indeed, is true when we see Namjoon “namjooning” around the city on his bicycle and sharing those precious moments with ARMYs. Mono had to be created for RM to part with his old self and his traumas. Mono is a tribute to a persona of his, which was necessary for him to experience. Mono acts as the bridge that he needed to cross in order to find his own happiness.
RM never created Mono to prove himself to others, to win something grand, or to take over someone great. He created this playlist because he owed it to himself. He wanted to create something that would feel like a hug, or just someone saying “You did a great job,” at times you need them the most. A whole world being comforted by it, and finding a true companion in it, is only the cherry on the cake for him.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER: We do not own any audio & visual content in this video except for the editing. ALL RIGHTS BELONG TO THE RIGHTFUL OWNERS. No copyright infringement intended.
Written By: Ananya
Edited by Mheer
Checked by Vera
Comments