‘Love Myself’ – two words that have been making the rounds on social media over the last couple of years with celebrities and influencers actively voicing their support to spread it far and wide. But what does it mean to ‘love myself’? Coming from a Southeast Asian country, I have never once in my life been taught by my parents to love myself. The usual phrases were “you should love your family,” “you should love your friends,” “you should love your husband and children when you get married.” But ‘me’ never featured in any of them.
I cannot speak for all like me, but this is the general trend of children growing up in middle-class Asian families, especially girls. The idea that one can be precious to themselves is alien to us. We could never appreciate our own selves, and if we committed the mistake of putting our happiness before others, we would be branded as ‘selfish’. In the West, the pressure is present, but at least children are allowed to grow into adults of their choice, pursue what makes them happy. In the past couple of years, the molds of society have drastically changed, driven by the prevalent situations and with that, the possibilities of what it means to ‘love myself’ have opened up.
BTS has been the flag-bearers of love, growth, and mental health – so much so that they partnered up with UNICEF for the #LoveMyself campaign that has reached almost every country in the world according to a publication by UNICEF. Their campaign is not just about tweets and shares, it involves taking the positive messages of self-love and self-care to those who are drowned in negativity, doubt, and violence. BTS being real-life ambassadors of these messages was the driving force behind the success of the campaign. Opening up about their own insecurities and sharing the journey of finding happiness by accepting their flaws and triumphs have made a sizable number of people step up to find happiness and self-esteem. What also adds to the impact is the fact that BTS came from an industry that was not comfortable with the subjects of depression and mental health, let alone making songs about them. BTS sang about frustration, depression, acceptance, loneliness, self-worth, love, and possibly all those emotions that we feel every day in our lives but are scared to accept or talk about.
Looking out for one’s own happiness should never be termed as ‘selfishness,’ because if one is not happy and content with their own life, one can never fully participate in making others happy. BTS may not have invented this theory of life, but they sure have played a great role in making not just the youth, but people of all ages realize the importance of this theory in their lives. Loving yourself is not a competition; each one can have a different way of loving themselves – another very important message conveyed through BTS songs such as “Answer: Love Myself” and “Epiphany.” Each one is unique, precious, and loved!
Though the percentage of fanboys is growing steadily, it is a common fact that the majority of the fandom is female. I mentioned at the start that it is more difficult for a female to devote their life to their own happiness as they are conditioned to live for others, especially in Asian countries. Therefore, this female-dominated fandom is finding a voice for itself in a sea of chaos through seven Korean men whom they have never met. Some of them might have never been to a concert or owned official merchandise to show for BTS’ impact on their lives. But maybe they make time for themselves at the end of a tiring day to read a book or make a cup of their favorite coffee when things go south, or aimlessly lie on the bed when they want to take a break. Loving myself is all about indulging in the big and small pleasures of life that make you enjoy and love living. It is about prioritizing yourself and your mental health above everything else.
The COVID-19 pandemic has added greatly to the importance of self-love and care. For the past two years, we have been bound to our homes, and when we do step out, the fear of infection looms constantly at the back of our minds. The successive waves of infection have taken away the normalcy of pre-pandemic life. It is easier to get frustrated, angry, sad, depressed, and feel all the negative emotions at a time when all plans fail, when there is a question of life and death, and when there is a dearth of hope. Self-love is essential to survive this phase of despair, to keep oneself going when everything seems futile. BTS has time and again talked about their struggles through this phase and has encouraged ARMY to indulge in self-love through their songs and other digital content such as “In the SOOP.”
The recent years have diversified the definitions of love, happiness, care, and growth and with that, we have come to prioritize self-love and happiness. If you haven’t yet warmed up to the idea of loving yourself, let the seven men from Korea sing “I am the one I should love in this world” to help you fall in love with yourself.
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Written By: Basabdatta
Edit By: Aury